The Day She said 'No'

A lady aged 58-year, who had experienced two heart attacks, had been told to take things more easily in life, but remained very driven—she worked part time, but had always taken work home with her, and took on many problems of her friends and family. She felt like ‘everyone’s dustbin’ but was unable to say ‘no’ to other people. Her neighbor, in particular, used to drop in regularly and expect this lady to drop what she was doing and listen to her problems.

She told me "I must always help out others in need. If not, they will think badly of me and never speak to me again. Other people’s needs are more important than my own."

"If I say ‘no’ to my neighbour, she will think I’m being rude, storm out, and never speak to me again. That would be more stressful than just listening, yet again

We planned a one-hour rest period for this lady each day, which was usually interrupted by things to do. She planned to try and protect this time assertively from interruptions. Her neighbour came round just as Lady was about to rest.lady told her she was busy, but could see the neighbour the following morning for coffee for half an hour.

Her neighbour did indeed flounce off upset that she was unable to talk about her problems. Rather than feeling upset about this, Lady thought her neighbour was being very selfish, and felt annoyed with her but pleased she had been firm. Later on, the neighbour dropped her a note to apologize,and invited lady round to her house for coffee the following morning. lady went round, but kept to her half-hour limit

Lady’s new perspective following the experiment was that ‘I can say ‘no’ to others, and need to do this more to look after myself ’.

having shared story of the lady who learned to say 'No', I would like to share a wonderful resource published by world health organization for elderly people believe that needs of others are more important than theirs because they are old. There are several other age related beliefs that affects quality of life of older adults adversely. Please download the document using below link and share with anyone whom it may help.

WHO Resource for Older Adults - Ageing, Exploding the Myths : Download Now

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लोकशाही आणि भांडवलशाहीच्या विळख्यातून

आज सकाळी कॉल आला तुमचं काय मत आहे कोण जिंकेल ? खूप गुंतागुंती आहे नाही सांगता येणार मॅडम . तुम्ही कोणाला मत देणार असं स्पष्ट विचारल तेव्हा मी जरा थांबून म्हंटलं मत गोपनीय ठेवायचा हक्क आहे ना लोकशाहीत . त्यावर मॅडम म्हणाली सर आम्ही डेटा कलेक्ट करतोय .... मी म्हंटलं तुम्हाला तुमच्या कामासाठी शुभेच्या . कॉल संपला ... माझं मत मतदान आणि एकंदर लोकशाही बद्दल एखाद्या आर्ट फिल्म च्या हिरो सारखे आहे , जे सहसा लोंकाना पटत नाही . त्यामुळेच मी या विषयावर मौन राहणं उत्तम समजतो . ‘लोकशाही’ आणि ‘ भांडवलशाही’ या दोन्ही संकल्पना मुळातच परस्परविरोधी आहेत . अफाट जनसंख्या असणाऱ्या देशात लोकशाही नापास होते किंवा भांडवलशाहीच्या मुखवट्यात आपले तोंड लपवण्यास लाचार होते . भांडवलशाह नफेखोरी करताना लोकशाहीची मूलभूत तत्व कित्येकदा विसरतात . ' समता ' (equality) आणि पारदर्शकता (transparency) ही लोकशाहीची दोन मूलभूत त...

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